


My Idiot Supernatural Hunter Family

by pwebes



Series: Idiot Pack Family [3]
Category: Criminal Minds (US TV), Supernatural, Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: FBI Agent Stiles Stilinski
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-21
Updated: 2020-07-21
Packaged: 2021-03-04 23:46:51
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,490
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25414885
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pwebes/pseuds/pwebes
Summary: Stiles has been working at the FBI now for close to two years. It has been a few months since the team's trip to Beacon Hills and the team has been watching Stiles subtly trying to figure out his crazy life. The team is on a case when his cousins Sam and Dean need a favor from him. Stiles life becomes crazy and hectic once again when his family member Sam Winchester has been kidnapped by the King of Hell, Crowley, out of pure boredom. Stiles has to once again help solve a serial killer case while keeping his BAU team from being too suspicious of him.
Relationships: Allison Argent/Scott McCall, Derek Hale/Stiles Stilinski, Lydia Martin/Jackson Whittemore, Vernon Boyd/Erica Reyes
Series: Idiot Pack Family [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1387780
Comments: 15
Kudos: 205





	My Idiot Supernatural Hunter Family

After the whole fiasco that was traveling to Beacon Hills Stile’s teammates kept a closer eye on him. It’s been about a month since the visit and Stiles phone once again rang “Who Let the Dogs Out” this time in the middle of a case in WIntersville, New York and they just gave the profile of the unsub to the local officers. Stiles answers as all they are doing right now is looking through files trying to find how the unsub picks his victims. 

“Hello? Everything okay?”

“Umm…. we might have a slight situation.”

“How slight?” Stiles asks suspiciously 

“Well hunters may be in town, specifically hunters by the name of Sam and Dean Winchester.”

“Hunters!? That’s not a slight issue! Luckily, I know those two idiots, they happen to actually be cousins of mine on my mom’s side. I’ll call them and tell them what’s up.”

“You sure that’s a good idea?”

“Yea, we’ve kept in contact over the years, filled them in on some of what was happening and they filled me on what was happening with them. They probably just wanted to surprise visit me or something forgetting I no longer live there permanently. .”

“Okay call me if any problems arise from the call, miss you Red.”

Stiles gets a small smile on his face “Always, and I miss you too sourwolf but after this case I’ll try to visit, promise.”

“Love you my mate.”

“Love you too my boo”

With that said Stiles hangs up looks at his team mates gathered around the table not so subtly multitasking and listening in as they work “Sorry about that. I just need to make another call and then I should be good.”

Hotch raises an eyebrow but replies “that’s fine.”

Stiles nods his head and stands up this time, but stays in the room as there is no real privacy anywhere else in the local small precinct unless he wants to hang in the bathroom to make the call. He dials a number and once they pick up he says surprised “Oh hey Gabe, can you put Sam on I need to talk to him.”

“Crowley kinda kidnapped him.”

“What do you mean by Crowley has him!?” Stiles starts to pace around the room and the team looks on curious and slightly concerned abandoning the file searching for the moment.

“Well we believe he is bored and you know how he loves to mess with the Winchesters so..”

“Can’t you just like go and get him.”

“Crowley hid himself and Sam from me leaving me a message. We think it’s a scavenger hunt.”

“I just got a call from Derek that you guys were visiting Beacon Hills?”

“Ah yea, the first clue points there, we were hoping you would be there to help us out too.”

“Sorry, I’m in New York. What’s the clue though?”

“Go to the beacon of supernatural and talk to the twice dead wolf where a special key can be found.”

“Well that would Peter then. I can call and give them a heads up. No clue what he means by key though.”

“Ahh…anyway you could pop in and talk to Peter for us? Dean is nervous approaching the pack of wolves and I’d rather not have to use my angel grace to save him if I can help it. ”

“Sorry I can’t get away anytime soon to make it back home. I’ll call Derek later and tell him what’s up. They will definitely be standoffish and mistrusting but they will give you the benefit of the doubt since I know you. When will you be in Beacon Hills?”

“Uh like right now. We plan to talk to them tonight.”

“Don’t do that! Never approach at night for a meeting. Contact them today somehow and set up a meeting for tomorrow morning. Someone will manage to get back to you. ”

“You sure I can’t just pop you back home and we can settle this easier.”

“Maybe… we shall see, call me later.”

With that said he hung up and looked at his teammates who all looked at him curiously and concerned Stiles nearly forgetting they were in the room. Hotch spoke up “Is everything okay?”

“Yea it’s all good my cousins' frenemy is just playing a joke on my cousins.”

“By kidnaping someone?” Hotch asks blandly with a raised eyebrow trying to not betray any feelings. 

Stiles bobs his head “Yea… it’s all harmless fun.” He ends in a sheepish ‘that’s just how my family rolls’ kind of shrug

The team just all give him a look like “okaaayy”, knowing Stiles is hiding something. They are profilers and can analyze body language and tone of voice for a living, however they pretend to believe him and go back to work. 

Stiles sends a text to Derek saying ‘The young win is kidnapped by the king of hell. There is a scavenger hunt to find him and Peter was the first clue. I told them to contact you somehow today for a meeting tomorrow morning. Also, De will be accompanied by an angel or two.’

The message Stiles gets back says ‘Thanks. Will send Isaac and Erica for interception tonight. Any way to be home tomorrow.?’

‘We shall see.’ Stiles texts back and then goes back to reading paperwork. 

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

The next evening most of the team arrive back to the station later that night after a new victim was found earlier in the day. Stiles and JJ arrived back first and started looking for more clues and connections. When the rest of the team arrive, they see Stiles outside arguing with a tall man with slicked back long brown hair sucking a lollipop. It looks heated and Stiles points to the team that are coming closer “I said call not visit!!”and shakes his head as the man in the trench coat speaks. 

“Everything’s gone wrong Stiles! The betas scratched and attacked Squirrel. Zombie is being very uncooperative and Crowley now set a time limit of 3 days or Moose will get hurt. Wolf is just growling at everyone. I don’t want to use my trickster skills cause that will just upset them forever and I have no clue what to look for using my Grace.”

Stiles takes a deep breath “All Wolf said was that Squirrel provoked the betas and that he would take care of it.”

“Oh, he provoked them alright. As we were walking away he mumbled ‘I have no clue why Hood likes living with all them animals’. They grabbed Squirrel and well, have a bunch of sharp things pointed his way.”

Stiles sighs and shakes his head “ Alright give me an hour tops and I’ll take care of it. Your help would be appreciated.”

With that Gabriel nodded his head and dashed around the corner. The team walking closer and having heard everything Emily asks “Everything okay?”

“Yea just some problems back home that I need to deal with.”

“Do you need to go home now. I am sure we can manage if there is an emergency.” Offers Hotch

Stiles sighs and shakes his head “No it’s not an emergency, just people being over dramatic and stubborn. I can call home later and deal with it all.”

Morgan still concerned as Stiles has become like a little brother says “Okay, well if there is any way we can help we will.”

Stiles smiles a genuine smile “Thanks guys I know.”

Hotch speaks up again “You can head back to the hotel now if you want to start dealing with the situation. We are probably just debriefing a bit and then heading to the hotel. I am sure one of us can fill you in tomorrow.”

“Thanks, Hotch, I’ll probably see you guys tomorrow then.” Stiles waves goodbye and walks away to his car.

“Anyone else think that conversations was weird?” inquires Emily.

“Yea it was definitely in some type of code” Morgan says slightly suspicious.

“Did you know only 1 in 5 people who use code are doing something legal with their coded messages ” stated Reid. 

“Well he passed the background check so I am sure its legal” Hotch mentioned being optimistic. 

The others were really hoping Hotch was right as they really didn’t want to have to arrest Stiles who became like a little brother to everyone after a year and half of working there. 

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Stiles back at the hotel prays to the Archangel Gabriel “Hey Gabe, if you want my help, help me get home.”

The next second Stiles was standing on the porch of the pack house. He showed up behind the pack and he can see either them with their claws out or have knifes or arrows pointed at Dean. Derek is glaring Dean to death as Dean glares right back with a cut on his face bleeding slightly. 

“I am not here for one meeting and it turns to complete chaos!” Stiles yells surprising everyone but Derek. 

“STILES!” his pack mates yell however they don’t lower their weapons or claws.

“So, want to tell me what happened here and why I had to lie to my teammates yet again for something that should have been simple.” Stiles questions in a deathly calm voice and the pack knows they are in trouble. Everyone but Derek starts to speak at once.

Stiles holds up his hand and everyone stops talking even Dean who has only seen Stiles this mad before when he accidently hurt one of his packmates when he and his pack mate stumbled upon Sam and Dean who was taking a short break before their next hunt. 

“Now I am going to ask two people what happened here. I have already got Gabe’s version of events.” Here he sees Dean wince. 

“Now Dean, your turn to share what went wrong and remember I and my pack will know if you lie or hold back, but before that…….. everyone claws and weapons away!”

No one acts right away and Stiles calmly says “3” and everyone rushes to put their claws away and put their weapons down.

“There now that that is taken care of please continue Dean”

Dean swallows nervous “Well Me, Cas, and Gabe came here to your pack house at the scheduled meeting time. Peter over there was being difficult about helping us. I might have yelled a bit at him and threatened him a bit”

Stiles glares hardens at Dean who gulps and continues “um eventually we came to an arrangement to get his help. We owe him a favor and have to give him 3 of our grenades.”

When Stiles hears that he gives a sharp questioning look to Peter who shrugs “Hey you never know when grenades will come in handy and we don’t have any.”

Stiles sighs and makes a head movement almost in agreement and goes back to glaring at Dean who continues.

“Anyways we are about to head out to meet Peter somewhere else for his help when I forget that wolves have super hearing and mumble under my breath wondering how you love these people even Peter.”

“Dean they are my family now, I thought you respected that.”

“ I respect it, but it doesn’t mean I have to like it or understand it.”

“Fair enough, but I would stay away from insulting them. They are quicker than you may anticipate.” After a brief pause Stiles speaks again “Lydia, care to explain to me why an insult resulted in everything becoming hairy and pointy.”

Lydia lets out a little huff in amusement and annoyance “Well he said and I quote ‘I don’t know how he can live with these mutts, he deserves better, someone who won’t hurt him in his sleep.’ … The pack got offended that he thought we would hurt you especially as he seemed to imply Derek would kill you in your sleep, and well he also seemed like he wanted to take you away from us.”

Stiles face softens and he smiles at each member of his pack “Guys you all are my pack, my family, I will never leave you without a fight. Even if Derek magically becomes an emotional constipated wolf again I will stay.”

He then glares “However, your behavior was uncalled for. Sam and Dean are my family too, Dean tends to lash out when Sam is in danger” with that he gives them all a pointed look “also you guys cannot wolf out figuratively and literally at every person who disagrees with how we interact. What if it was a secret check up by the council to make sure our pack is stable and not a danger to nonwolves? Glaring and growling is fine, attacking is not and threatening is not.” 

After pausing to give pointed looks to everyone Stiles continues “Which means only Derek and Peter are off the hook. The young pups have to do chores with no allowance for 2 weeks and the adults pups have to go on patrol for the next 2 weeks. I will tell you your partners later. 

“But Stiles!” people shout out trying to change his mind. Stiles just gets his mom face on and looks at everyone pointedly “yes mom/grandmom” they respond.

“Now that that’s taken care of.” Stiles shouts “ Peter! What is the clue on this scavenger hunt about you? I have about 8 hours before anyone back in NY becomes suspicious. So how can I help?”

Peter speaks out “Well the Key is in the family vault and I believe the hint is talking about the book I have on the king of hell. It talks about how the position can be filled by anyone it doesn’t have to be Lucifer. The front page has a crown with a key on it.”

“Okay, I know which one you mean.” Stiles then closes his eyes snaps his fingers and the book is in his hands.

Dean is gaping at him as the pack doesn’t look surprised. 

“Okay let me speed read this.” He quickly flips through the pages his eyes glowing a bit. “So, I think I found the next clue. In here the book says and I quote ‘Two brothers will fail at different times. To get back the brother go to where they first fell”

“Why the heck is that in a book about the King of Hell!?”

“Uh the chapter is about how humans (not demon turned humans but true humans) can become the King of Hell and how to make the human brother see their mistake and no longer want to be evil. It’s a weird book”

“You sure that’s the clue?”

“Yea trust me, there is no map, no key mentioned in the book at all, and that is the only passage about brothers and getting one back. I read it like 2 times.”

Derek asks “So where was the first time Sam failed?”

“Uh probably when he drank demon blood for the first time? It could be when he failed to kill the yellow demon cause he couldn’t shoot dad? Or it could be when he failed to save Jessica?”

“Well how about Cas and Gabe transport you to each place you think of and when you find a new clue you can text me for help if you need it?”

“Sounds good, can I keep baby here?”

“Yea, no one will mess with it” Stiles says as he gives them all another pointed look.

“By the way we still want the at least 2 grenades, but Peter doesn’t need a favor.”

Peter growls at that but doesn’t say or do anything. Dean looks at Stiles and then sighs and grabs two grenades from the secret trunk compartment and toss them to Stiles who catches them. And then Cass, Gabe and Dean pop away.

Derek then hugs Stiles from behind and the rest of pack join in a group hug. Derek speaks up after a moment “So you have 8 hours before you need to be back?”

Stiles sighs “More like 6 if I want any sleep”

“I’m sure we can arrange pack time and include some sleep time before you have to be back.”

As soon as Derek said that the others rush away and quickly make a fort in the living room and pop in a movie that everyone can agree on, so some type of Disney/Pixar movie probably. Soon enough everyone is snuggled under the fort everyone touching each other with popcorn and cookies settled in to have a Disney/Pixar marathon.

Before they know it the alarm Stiles set to wake him up if he fell asleep and to warn him he needs to get back to New York goes off. Everyone growls and groans at being woken up with only maybe 2-4 hours of sleep. 

Stiles quickly escapes and whips up some breakfast with coffee and hot coco for everyone. Soon enough everyone is in the kitchen having a good time. Stiles’ second alarm goes off and it becomes quiet. 

“Sorry guys I’ve got to go” The pack all let out whines as everyone rushes to Stiles to hug him. Derek hugs him the last and for the longest.

“You be careful you hear me.”

Stiles smiles “Yes alpha. Love you Sourwolf”

“Love you to my own Red”

Stiles waves to the pack” Love you guys too, I’ll visit for at least a full day next time!” 

The Pack all respond back with different version of love you, miss you, and byes.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Stiles pops back into his room using his spark right as knocking is heard on his door. He quickly yells out “yea I’ll be out in 5 minutes” He quickly changes normally saving his spark energy after traveling across the country with it and heads out his door. He opened the door wide and Morgan can see inside and see that his bed is perfect like he didn’t sleep in it. He doesn’t say anything though except “How’d you sleep”

Stiles shrugs and says “I was up most of the night dealing with the stuff back home.” Stiles smiles softly “My family misses me and I fell asleep talking to them on the phone.”

“You sure you don’t need to go home? I’m sure Hotch wouldn’t mind. We can handle it here.”

Stiles shakes his head “No I’m good, I dealt with it yesterday. Anything else I can deal with by quick text or a call.” 

Morgan nods his head and then they rejoin the group at the lobby, turns out everyone was waiting on Stiles. 

Hotch speak up “Everything good?”

“Yea Hotch, it’s all good, I just overslept a bit is all. I hit the snooze one to many times” Stiles says with a little chuckle wondering how easy it is to lie to a bunch of behavior analysts . 

They all head to the car to head to the precinct with the different roles Hotch decided to assign everyone before Stiles got down. Morgan whispers to Stiles “We are going to check out the new crime scene that happened over night.”

Stiles raises an eyebrow “He’s escalating, that’s both good and bad” 

“Yea”  
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Morgan and Stiles make it to the crime scene where they see the poor victim with her face viciously beaten in and her clothes all torn up so they are basically scrapes. 

“He broke, normally he leaves the girls in pristine white clothing but this time it was like he didn’t have time or could have cared less. I mean the only reason we know it’s the same guy is because of the position the girl was laid in and the message next her.”

“Yea we need to find this unsub fast before another girl becomes his next victim. Let’s head back and inform the others what we found.”

They head to the SUV and once they get in and Morgan is driving Stiles’ phone rings this time with the song “Who You Gonna Call” or the ghostbusters theme. Morgan raises an eyebrow as Stiles mumbles “Another inside joke.” 

He then picks up the phone and says “Hey De what’s up any progress?”

“We found the next clue but it makes no sense. “

“Well what’s the clue then.”

“It’s an apple with a snake drawn on it and the number 21-22 written on it.”

“Well its Crowley right? He’s ancient and it was believed to be a snake that tempted Eve to eat the forbidden fruit believed to be an apple in the garden of Eden so 21 must be the verse/line that the clue means. How did one of your godly companions not think of this?”

“Ah well actually Cas and Gabe are dealing with hellhounds right now. They flashed my away as they dealt with it. I didn’t feel like waiting. You wouldn’t happen to know what the 21st verse of the creation story is would you?”

“Hold on a minute ill look it up.” Stiles googles the creation story from genesis on his phone and then gets back on the phone talking to dean “Okay so the 21st and 22nd lines say ‘ Until you return to the ground, since from it you were taken,’ so maybe travel to when Crowley took S..your brother.” 

“I guess it can’t hurt to start there. Cas and Gabe are back talk to you later. Thanks.” Dean abruptly hangs up and Stiles is left to shake his head and sigh.

Morgan curious about Stiles’ life asks “Everything okay?”

“Yea just my cousin is sometimes…um difficult to deal with especially when he is worried about his brother.”

“Shouldn’t he leave this scavenger hunt to the police if someone truly kidnapped his brother.”

Stiles gives a little huff “Like I said before it’s just harmless fun. No one is actually gonna die or anything. De is just a bit overprotective of his younger brother sometimes.”

Morgan just nods his head and they keep on driving until they get back to the precinct. 

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

The team are back at the station trying to find the connection between the victims and how the unsub knows and finds them all. They know what area he most likely lives and works in but they still have no idea who the unsub is or how he is finding his victims. They are digging through files and bouncing off ideas when Morgan’s phone rings. 

“Hey baby girl what you got for us?”

“Only the thing that will crack the case.”

“Oh, you are a goddesses”

Garcia lets out a small giggle before getting serious “So it took some digging but I finally found the connection. Each victim came in to report one crime or the other and they all had an officer William Jenkins as the responding officer.”

Hotch speaks up” It’s something.”

The lead detective helping them speaks up worried “Officer Jenkins has called in sick today. Said he must have eaten something wrong last night. Come to think of it I think he went home with a family emergency after you guys gave the profile yesterday morning.” 

Everyone widens their eyes and share glances as this officer is most likely their unsub as he fits their profile. They all grab their coats and make their way to the door. The detective calling out for backup. As Garcia gives them the address of the officer’s house. 

They speed to the suspected unsubs house and barely wait to safely stop the cars as they hop out. 

“Morgan and Reid take the back, Rossi and Stilinski take the side door, Detective you are with me and Pretensis. Officers pick a group and go with them.”

They rush the house clearing the rooms until Rossi and Stiles get to the basement with their officer backup. They head down carefully and see the unsub with his service gun to his head. As soon as he sees the group heading down he pulls the trigger. There is a girl handcuffed to a pole and Stiles heads over to comfort her as the others come rushing into the room.

After everything was documented and statements given the FBI agents head back to the hotel in the two SUVs. Hotch, Stiles, JJ and Morgan are in one car and Ross, Pretensis, and Reid are in the other. 

Stiles is sitting in the back seat with JJ next to him answers his phone when once again “Who You Gonna Call” plays. Stiles takes a deep breath before answering almost as if he was gathering up the energy to deal with the crazy he is about to be exposed to. 

“Hey What’s up?”

“Sammy’s been found. Both him and Dean are sleeping.”

Stiles lets out a sigh of relief and leans back into his seat. He lets out a small smile aware of the eyes of his team on him as they have been more curious and less subtle in watching him ever since the visit to Beacon Hills. 

“How’d you guys find him?”

“Well you were right about the creation story verse clue. We went to his location and there was a statue of him with yellow eyes and dead with a knife in his back. So, we popped into the crossroads where Dean made that one demon deal to save Sam’s life and there was Crowley with a gagged Sam. Dean threatened a bit. Crowley threatened back and Sam was released just like the note promised and everything is back to normal.”

“That’s good. I’m glad to hear my cousins have each other’s backs again. Thanks for the update Gabriel.”

“Your welcome. Thanks for earlier back at the pack house.”

Stiles smiles bigger at the mention of pack and says “It gave me a chance to see them and talk to them so it’s all good. I’ll probably visit them this weekend actually.”

“Let me know of you need any help. My trickster side owes you a favor for helping to save Sammy.”

“Will do, I’ll probably take you up on that one day.”

“Check your pockets” The trickster/archangel says and then hangs up.

Stiles confused checks his pockets and in his coat pockets he finds 7 suckers. Stiles shakes his head. 

Morgan raises an eyebrow ”That’s a lot of suckers.”

Stiles huffs “Yea. Your telling me one cannot fit 7 suckers in one mouth at a time. The most I ever had had 5.” Stiles looks at Morgan blinks and then smiles sheepishly “ Sorry, tmi. Um well there is 7 so maybe someone at the station gave them to me for us. Though that just seems weird but I have no other explanation for the suckers as they were not there this morning.” 

Laughing JJ says “Maybe it was the invisible man”

Stiles and Morgan laugh a little at that as Hotch lets out a small smirk in amusement as they head to the airport to head back to Virginia where Stiles will then pop home to California to see his pack.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! Comments and suggestions are always welcome! Please feel free to give me idea and suggestion on what you'd like to possibly see happen. Good luck in life and thanks again for reading hope you have enjoyed the series so far!


End file.
